A Teen's Guide to Modern Manners

There's little that's been written yet
Concerning teenage etiquette
So as a sort of useful guide
Some gruesome cases lie inside
Of teenagers who lost their way
And ultimately had to pay.
You'll read about the tragic fate
Of Pete who couldn't get a date
And Jen whose hopes and dreams were quashed
And James who staunchly never washed.
This book could be and no mistake
The best investment that you make
So quickly - pluck it from the shelf!
Or suffer some such fate yourself...